why tha crap do i have to go through this?

So today I got called some of the worst names imaginable, but is it gonna break me? No, I'm used to it. I have built up a tolerance to insults, an immunity to immaturity. Sure I cried, but Im not gonna dwell on it. Maybe I'm not made to be apart of this lifestyle. I'm just supposed to play my role, not object to anything. FOLLOW. I dont like following something I disagree with. I can't wait until I get this job! It will just be one step closer to gettin tha F*** outta here!  On a side note, my hair is lookin awesome and growing like a weed. It will be 2 years Feb. 5th since ive been locked up. This is my hairstyle of the day.

I know im late..

  So this starts out with me saying, yet again I am at another crossroads. I just left puerto rico after dealing with some rather bad experiences with my husband, took our baby girl with me and moved back into my dad's house. Im freakin back in Oklahoma! arrggghhh... I really hate that feeling when you are not progressing in life the way you thought you would. The way your parents thought you would.... Anyway, so I have a different way of thinking when it comes to life and spirituality. I was raised to believe everything my parents told me, and conditioned to not think for myself, never search for truths etc. So my crossroads right now is more of a moral one, based on alot of technicalities. I never expected to come back to the U.S. and now I feel i must conform, but im fighting the urges. I'd like to think Im a rare breed of person who can think out side of the box of social influences, and what is considered "normal", but I feel the itch of conformity. It's just starting with little things, and I wont get specific, because I have a tendency to run from criticism.  You only get one life anyway, but I will find my way... hopefully without many more mistakes. Im on my second marriage, and it would be nice to have some supportive feedback. I guess i'll work it out..